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Looking for online therapy? You found the right place.
Currently offering telehealth and in-person sessions.
Teen Counseling
Are you worried about your teen and don’t know how to help?
You may know your teen is hurting and your help and support don’t feel like enough… or you try to help but they won’t let you in… or when sensitive issues are brought up you find yourself in conflict with them again and getting nowhere.
Maybe your teen is stuck in inaction.
You see them falling behind, you know they can accomplish more than they are but your attempts at helping just lead to tears, yelling, anger and feeling further apart.
Often when teens are struggling with motivation and school they are also struggling with feelings of not being enough - not smart enough, not strong enough, not good enough. They will always be able to find someone who seems smarter and more capable so how can they compare? What is even the point?
On the other hand, if your child has been used to always doing well, the normal process of becoming more challenged academically in middle and high school can feel unsettling and overwhelming. When they feel challenged they may begin to question every time they were told they were smart, doubting themselves and feeling like an imposter. They may worry that if they try hard and they still don’t do well, it is just proof that they were never that good to begin with. Trying becomes too risky.
Maybe you see your teen being overly hard on themselves.
They hold themselves to a high standard, struggle to confidently connect with friends, and hold themselves back. You worry that they may be depressed and missing out on the positives in life. You may also worry that substance use could be involved or that your teen might be having thoughts of hurting themself.
Our teens are living in a time of unprecedented stress.
According to the National Institutes of Health, nearly 1 in 3 teens, ages 13-18, will experience an anxiety disorder. Additionally, the rate of hospital admissions for suicidal teens has doubled in the past decade.
While anxiety in teens may be evident through recurring worries and fears, anxiety may also manifest as irritability, social withdrawal, dropping grades, trouble sleeping or concentrating, substance abuse or other risky behaviors, and physical complaints such as fatigue, headaches and stomachaches.
How did we get here?
While there is no one single cause to point to, we know that teens are experiencing a world that is more competitive and demanding than the world their parents grew up in. Many students sacrifice sleep in an attempt to keep up, in turn making themselves more emotionally and physically vulnerable.
Between concerns about the environment, routine active shooter drills, and now the impact and outcomes of the Covid-19 pandemic, their perception may be that the world is unsafe. Add in ever-present screens and social media presence, and many teens are feeling that they do not measure up.
As teens do the important work of figuring out who they are in the world, it can be particularly difficult for teens who experience themselves as not in the majority for a variety of reasons. It’s no wonder that so many teens are feeling stressed, lonely, depressed and anxious.
So how can counseling help?
As parents, we always want to be able to help our child. Yet, it is an essential part of development for teens to individuate from their families as they work to figure out who they are in the world and the parent-teen relationship is bound to be difficult at times.
Sometimes the best way to help is supporting them in finding an understanding therapist to connect with. As they work on what matters to them in counseling, oftentimes their relationships with family and friends strengthen as well.
My work with teens focuses on understanding who your child is and building a relationship based on trust and care.
I thoroughly enjoy getting to know teen clients - their likes and dislikes, their interests, hopes and dreams as well as what they wish was different. It's helpful for teens to hear and know that they are not alone in what they are thinking and feeling. When their experiences are normalized, they are able to be more compassionate toward themselves.
Through therapy, teens are given the space to explore their own needs and goals, weigh pros and cons, hone their better judgment and make positive choices for themselves. Therapy may focus on developing skills to improve self-care, to manage symptoms of anxiety and depression, to be more able to cope with stressors, and to communicate more effectively with others. When overwhelmed, they may be guided to approach challenges by breaking them into smaller steps.
When teens can begin to accept themselves as good enough, they know that they are more than what they do. This can free them up to embrace that doing something is usually better than doing nothing, helping them to get unstuck.
What if your child doesn’t want to go to counseling?
It’s really important for teens to feel heard and respected and to be given appropriate control over their own lives. At the same time, as the parent you may feel it is in their best interest and your responsibility to get them into counseling, especially if there are safety concerns. Often validating their feelings and concerns can go a long way. They may also respond well to a plan to attend an agreed on number of sessions and then to evaluate what they want to do from there.
For a free phone consultation or to schedule an appointment, please call or email
860-407-6506
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